Accidental Happiness. (whilst running, of course)

You should totally run that way with me.

I’m a runner.

I’ve also started another post that way. Funny how we can’t get past some things. Well, it’s not funny at all. It is a choice. But that is another (other) post I’ll write.

So, there was this guy (I know…I know…). Well, yea he was a guy, but he was also my friend. Who happened to be a boy that was my friend. You can see where I’m going with this, right?

We loved each other very much. I think even before we said it, there was lots of love happening there. I think said it first, you know “143”. Even though that was probably a bad idea and it perhaps maybe kinda ruined us (too), i’d do it all again #cbr.

Other things I said to him? “Let’s do a race together!” You don’t know me and you know how I feel about running! (ie: the blog) Can you feel it? Can you feel it?! Can you feel it?! I’m serious about these medals and ish! I begged, bribed, pleaded, prayed, whined and worried him about it. I wanted it soooo bad. I wanted him to run with me. To join me in experiencing this new part of me that I didn’t know was so damn important.

And it is. So. Very. Damn. Important.

…him? It was not all that important to him. Or fun. Or interesting. (all conjecture, ask him…clearly, I was not right about us… #NotAShotFired). #MedalMonday was just another day of the week for him. Running just was not for him. He told me that running was my “thing” and that it should be okay for me to do things that I liked, and him to do what he enjoyed. And for those to be different things, not necessarily done with each other. It was perfectly okay for us to not share these things… #TheBeginningOfTheEndFolks

Only that was not okay at all. Not that I knew it then (or expressed it well…hello…me and my feelings? #outoftouch) but running is not a hobby, or something I can (could) do without…not like shoe shopping #debatable, or video games, or fantasy football. Running is like my middle name, or genetic code, or my ethnic heritage. It is the essence of who I am. And, I am a runner. And it broke my spirit to hear him refuse me. And then my heart when he ran with other people. That day. That was the day that I really knew he did not want to run with me.

Now there is this other guy. (“guy”…lol…it’s just funny now). He is a friend. Who happens to be a boy. But we are not going anywhere with that. He is a great guy though…

He is also coming to see me. On my side of the world. Again. I’m on a new side of the world, and he is coming to visit me here too. He, he is going to run with me. Not just one race either. I’m also a spoiled brat given the right circumstances. I told this guy that the race we are going to do does not technically count, because it’s not one of my #14in2014. So he has to do another race with me. He has to do both.

He agreed.

I paused. I thought about my bossy, yet playfully cute banter with said guy. I inquired “why”? Why would he agree to do this with me? I had a boy who was my friend (first place we went), who loved me…him, who actively refused to run with me. First with his words, then with his silence. But now I’m getting a “yes”? Normally, I do not question “yes”. I take the keys to the Avalanche, ask for gas money, and return a day later, on empty. But I needed to know what changed.

There were a few reasons why. He wanted to do a race and was already planning on it in 2014 #fate (I guess the world does conspires to help you #TheAlchemist). He is already active and was a runner (sprinter) in his past, so it would be relatively easy for him to get back into it. And, it sounded like fun. These are all perfectly acceptable reasons to run with me.

The real answer, however, was not his response to me when I asked “why”. It was in his reaction to hearing me go on, and On, and ON about my mutha-fckin-medals! He commented on how much I enjoyed it. He said, “It really makes you happy?”

It does.

So my friends, here are the lessons learned on today:

1. I’m a runner. Running makes me happy. This means: Be Yourself. Being yourself will make you happy. Who knew?
2. When you are happy, other people want to be around you. This means, they will do something they once thought was incredibly stupid and not fun at all because it makes you happy. And, happiness is a grave, infectious disease. Get. Sick! (OMG, Who. Knew. This?) 
3. Some direct questions are answered indirectly. My friend CB was right. There are some questions you will never have to ask, mostly because you were already given the answers. You gotta watch for some answers, and listen for others when you aren’t asking questions. (Yea, I had no idea about this one until the homey told me. Like really, where do you learn this stuff?!?!?!!?!?)

He is indeed running with me for all the reasons he said. But he is really doing this with me because he knows it will make me happy.

Wait.

He wants to make me happy? O_o

*mind.officially.blown*