...defining ish.

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What is up with all this defining stuff man? I’m obsessed with it. I’m part scientist you know, because people be trying to figure out the meaning of life and how to chop down tree stumps at the same time. And how exactly does that machine work? Pass me one of those tool thingies. Duh…of course I want another glass of wine. Was that even a real question?

It’s such a wonderful predicament to live in these extremes. To live life in the moment, and take it for whatever comes. Then, in the very next moment to need to know the meaning of it. To be able to figure it all out, you know? Make sense of the most nonsensical things. Like our choices. The affairs of our hearts. Feelings. Like, I really try to figure out what my feelings mean. Like seriously, we joke about feelings, but how often do we admit being in them tho?!?!?! Just me? Okay. I’m the only one of us here who’s been stuck in a feeling…or six? Okay.

I wish there was a dictionary for those joints homey.

naïveté

buddy

alive

regret

time

unintelligible

inextricable

circumstantial

(new)normal

eventually

acquiesce

Anyway, what is all of this? Well, a window was open in my life a very long time ago. Just a sliver of a crack, but open, nonetheless. I almost had a chance at being brave, doing something different, stepping out on air, and gliding through clouds. I didn’t take that chance. I stayed inside of me. Afraid of all that unknown on the other side of the castle wall. I just didn’t Lord, and I could not tell you why #Brownstone.

When the chance found me again, I hesitated.

Now I’m here. With all these afterthoughts.

…defining ish.

…and looking for the victory in it. #FindTheLittleLovelyInTheseThings

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