When you sacrifice a shower #ToBeGreat

Dr Splits on Trees did a relay race. No not a basic race like the one she did in Las Vegas in 2013 – you know that “half of the half” of greatness turned 10K so it can kind of sound great now race (but we all know the truth). No, not that. She did a badass relay with 11 of her closest (read: I’m not sure how well she knew them folks, so I just picked a word that sounded nice) friends and relayed 200 miles. This kind of makes her almost as awesome as me and Alicia. But, she did do the “half of the half” in Las Vegas so, Alicia Keykey and I refuse to let her greatness be fully realized. But she hella close.

All on the brink of greatness and whatnot.

Well now, imitation being a form of flattery, I have signed up to do the same thing. This October I’ll be running Ragnar Napa Valley with 11 of my closest (read: I only know one person on this relay and I don’t even think we got assigned to the same van, but I guess I have enough time to get close to the 10 other people) sister friends.

Yup. 205 miles. Napa to Calistoga. Just call me Runner #8 (legs 8, 20, and 32) because I’m about that life. And by “bout that life” I mean, I have once again given someone a large(ish) sum of my hard earned money to do something terribly awful to myself for a medal. Because race medals are greatness. And I wanna be great. I’ve been (not) training my whole life for this! #MamaWilliMakeIt?

Bruh. You should see the way they describe these legs. Easy – Moderate – Hard – Very Hard. Da fawwwk o_0? Wheettt? What kind of descriptions are those? What does that mean? So I did what any person who signs up for something first, then goes back to read the instructions does…I started reading the website. Bro, they have their own bible. Their Own Bible, bro. I signed up for another religion unwittingly. I’ve actually used the phrase running gospel...I think the actual quote was preaching this running gospel… I’m a prophet, son. And, soon, I’ll be eulogizing my legs because…hello, the elevation chart on Leg 20 of this race? Did you see all of those directions? I get lost. I actually got lost, on a race, that was basically the equivalent of an out and back with a slight…SLIGHT…detour through a park. Who does this??

Running ‘baby jesus’…I have more questions.

So, 10 of my close-to-be+1-I-know-already friends and I are going to run 205 miles, relay style. Nonstop from Friday to Saturday. Legit like 24 hours a day into and out of the wee hours of the morning.

Awesome, right? Right.

A van with the runners will drive to the exchange point, drop off the next runner, pick up the person who just finished running and do it all over again.

Still awesome, right? Right.

And because we’ll be running nonstop. We’ll get sleep in the van, because right? Gotta keep running. Right? Yes, you actually have to keep running. Someone is waiting on you.

I promised myself I’d never go camping again (I’ll tell you that story one day), only to sign up for a race in which I’ll basically be camping.

I can be so basic sometimes.

I would say it’s part of the charm but what is charming about running, not showering, running again, THEN NOT showering again…and…repeating that with 5 of your won’t-be-close-much-longer friends?

Everything. Because, medals. Greatness. Glory. All of that.

Things I know for certain about myself…

1.    I don’t read things all the way;

2.    I love an adventure;

3.    I literally pay for people to allow me to torture myself;

AND

4.    I’ve signed up to run a race the Sunday following this.

Yep. You guessed it. Three full days of running with likely only A SINGLE (just 1 Lord) shower before the Friday race begins, and *hopefully* before the Sunday race.

You can’t get out of this Sunday race. It’s not just any race, but THE RACE. The race where you’re going to repeat the iRunTheBay Challenge – which doesn’t have to be a thing but totally is a thing. But what makes it a thing you ask? It’s where Running Hubby is going to complete his first #iRunTheBayChallenge. And, that is a thing. You have witnessed everyone’s #iRunTheBay run to greatness. Angelica Rollerskates is getting her medal too! I just gotta see that! This is one you cannot miss. Because, running, marriage, and choices yo, running, marriage, and choices. Yup. Choices.

You had better hug me after all of this. And rub my feet and legs. And feed me all of the foods. All of them. Greatness smells awesome. #LiesItellMyself #ToKeepFromCrying

Ragnar Napa Valley! It Begins >>

Epic. Summer. PR. #andBacon

…because what’s the point of running a repeat race if it doesn’t count for something? ~Dr. Splits on Trees & Alicia Keykey

They were right. What’s the point? If you’re going to run a repeat race, make it worth the #15in2015 #2015kIn2015. What’s left on the list? Well, I need the miles because I’m so behind. Okay, got it. What else? The only viable options for this race was to run with a new friend, or PR. And since we know I’m not about to PR, I need to make me a new friend… Or perhaps find a race to run on Monday and do back to back races.

Right. Make a new friend. #RunTwerkDrink(Eat)Repeat

At the Race Expo I did everything but make a new friend. I got my jelly belly energy and recovery beans, took my #EpicSummerRun race bib photo, and I sampled all the healthy serious runner nutritional things. Because, well, I’m a serious athlete. I even took the tour of the new #RnRHeavyMedals! OMG! I want them ALL! Perused the course map *looks the same as last year* and shaded a couple of classes people.

But, beach. So we left. And I did not make a single new friend. Ugh.

That’s okay though. I’m in San Diego, and I am going to have an amazing time. That’s more than enough. I’ve got half a year left to be great. I’ll be great then. Today, I’m chillin’.

And that was the plan. Show up, run a good race, then binge on wine and bacon. Because, Temecula and Slater's 50/50.

START: *marathon start* Dammit! I gotta pee. I hate these damn porta-potties. *my knee hurts* #JesusBeABalmInGilead

Mile 1: I actually feel good. I honestly think this is going to be a good run. Look at me being all positive and whatnot. Go Girl. Look at God work in your life!

Mile 2: Okay, maybe this is going to just be an “okay” run. *rubs knee* But, I’m still surprisingly positive. Go Figure?

Mile 3: That. Smells. Delicious! OMG! Who is making breakfast out here like that? Imma need a biscuit and some local honey. #allergies

Mile 4: Open Bar? For real though? You’re just going to make specialty drinks right in front of me? #TheyTriedIt

Mile 5: Shots of patron? Bruh!!!!!! C’mon legs…jog to the left just a little. Grab that cup…Remember, you gotta make a new friend! No? I gotta keep running? #ThisSucks #iHateSanDiego #andByHateImeanILoveThisPlace

Mile 6: Look at this mess. Half Marathon Relay exchange. People are finished running. And I’m out here acting like my knee don’t hurt and that refreshed runner over there doesn’t want to be my new friend.

Mile 7: Soooooo. You’re just going to pass me with a running stroller? You tried it. *turns jets on* I’m the RunLeader Dammit! Ask about me homey.

Mile 8: Okay. Maybe turning on the jets was a little premature. Lemme slow down and act like the 3 hour plus HALF of a marathon runner that likes to wear heels that I am.

Mile 9: That gottdamn hill. How in the hell did I forget about this? Fawwwwk! I quit. It’s not worth it Miss Celie.

Mile 10: This gottdamn Big 10 Water/Aid Station. No Mr. Ohio State Man, I don’t want nothing from you. #Michigan #FabFive #AllDay

Mile 11: Father God, if I don’t make it, please allow my phone batter to send a GPS signal to somebody to find my body…so I can be resuscitated and have wine with my friends.

Mile 12: That dude though. Heeeeey Bae! How You Doin??? Mr. No Shirt Running the Marathon Looking All Refreshed … while I’m over here dragging in this half looking all…oh…my…God…what…do…I…look…like? #RunToTheOtherSideOfTheStreet *prays he didn’t see me*

Mile 13: If there isn’t any chocolate milk at the finish OR if Alicia Keykey drinks it all, heads will rock and roll!!!! #seewhatididthere?

Mile 13(0.1): Welp. You tried it. Well, kinda not really, but hey, it was a good effort in running a good race. You’ll get that PR one day. But today? You’re getting wine and bacon. You did good! You iz impo’tant.

         

Finish: Awwwww… Looked at my homeys all waiting for me to finish. I luhhhh dem! Now about that wine and bacon? #ImFocusedMan #Priorities #DrinksChocolateMilk

I was pretty over this whole situation. I ran a decent race. I was in San Diego with my friends. I felt pretty good, despite my knee. I was pretty done with running in that moment, and ready to enjoy the rest of my #Racecation #Runcation.

We made it back to the hotel and began the dance of getting ready for our adventures. Out of sheer curiosity, I decided to take a look at my time to see how I did. I mean, the last #EpicSummerRun was awesome, and I ended up running my fastest time. Sure I didn’t run my fastest time today, but I probably did better than I think I did, right? I mean, I actually feel good, right?

*screams*screams*screams*MORE SCREAMS*

Yup. You guessed. It. Got that PR. By 6 minutes. 6 whole minutes.

I can’t with myself sometimes. There are all of the things to say about this. Mostly, one would think that I’ve learned by now that my subconscious’ will to be great is too strong to be anything but great.

Flawless victory on the pavement. And I had no idea I even did it.

#15ThingsIn2015 Challenge

5 new states (Louisiana – 1 down, 4 to go)

4 new friends (OldieButNewbie #RunningHubby; My Child – 2 down, 2 to go)

3 new running events (Shamrock Half; St Charles Road Race; Orange County Half – 3 down, 0 to go)

2 back-to-back running events

1 Half Marathon PR (Rock N Roll San Diego! 6 minutes! – 1 down, 0 to go)

Being Presidential #ShamrockinGoodTimes

It’s been weird, you know, focusing on the miles and other things. It seemed more daunting, and yet manageable, to find a running event, sign up, show up, and show out. That kept me pretty busy. However, this year, every mile counts. I’m getting credit for waking up and running. And although that doesn’t happen every day, the fact that I can technically get up, go run, and get credit for it, is awesome.

You know what else is awesome? Spending time with Eboogie and Dr. Splits on Trees in the Capital City. Did yall know that Alicia Makeykey aka Eboogie aka always wanna call someone an overachiever but she really is the one achieving over stuff is training for a Marathon??? Right. Same thing I said.

So, we’re just calling this a training run for her. I mean, she had to run 20 miles, so a half is like, a warm up. So we (read: she) warmed up.

Okay, for real though. It’s an opportunity for Alicia to get a quick PR on her way to greatness #1PercenterStatus. For me to you know, be basic for bling, but log a hash mark in that new running event category. And for REJIII #ThePresident (JustBob) to get that first half marathon medal! See…we can all be great for different reasons on the same pavement.

Only 67% of that paragraph is going to be great. I spent all my greatness on… A tooth extraction, a night of dancing, a damn-near-half-marathon hike, ineffective pain medication, and well…life. You’re not surprised by this at all. You expect this from me. I’m so loyal to you.

Our race outfits were on fleek, while the right side of my face was on FAAAWWWWKK! Yo, getting a tooth extraction without proper pain medication and antibiotics is the devil. Ain’t nothing holy in it. Except maybe the hole in the back of my mouth stitched up by grace and new mercies.

Sacramento was beautiful. It’s been so long since the last time I ran SacTown #MOOnlight10k #AliciaOverAchievedThatDayToo, that I would have appreciated the beauty (OldieButNewbie #RunningHubby reads: booty) but it was hard to concentrate.

Enter Dr. Splits on Trees. See, the night before we were having wonderful conversations about life and running, and you know, smart people stuff. This somehow, inextricably led to conversations about the struggle of us Black folks and freedom and whatnot. Seriously. All from a conversation about running Rock n Roll DC in 2016. We went from taking selfies at the Dr. King Memorial during the run, to who was going to pace us on the Underground Railroad. Yes I love my friends. No, you cannot have them.

This, of course means that Dr. Splits on Trees is waiting for you around Mile 3-ish with a sign instructing you to run for your freedom. Our ancestors made it possible for me to be out here running this race. I just… I just… Just why Lord? Why?

Shortly past this point I was jealous that old people could remove their teeth and gums, but I like, still kinda needed mine. My jaw was killing me.

So, at around Mile 9 or so, I was ready to give it up. I mean, really, why are these my life choices? I’ve been compressing my hand to the side of my face, jogging and popping Tylenol with codeine because Kaiser wouldn’t let my original pain medication prescription be fully realized.

For the first time in history of a running event, I stopped. I deviated from the course, and took a detour into a restaurant. I’ve paused my run for a potty break, or to grab water from the stations, but never a non-race-related stop. I had to get ice. The side of my jaw felt like I went a few rounds with Evander Holyfield or something. I could not take it.

A nice man behind the bar filled my empty zip lock bag (once hold my less than effective pain medication) with ice. Gave me a cool plastic cup of water, and then wished me luck. As I began again, feeling defeated that I left the course, there was a group of happy people passing out refreshments. Because orange juice is refreshing and champagne is new life.

I mean, eventually I finished. But that wasn’t my reason for being there. See, #ThePresident was having a first experience too. We turkey trotted, but that is nothing compared to this. A half marathon? And we’ve traveled to the Capital City to inaugurate #ThePresident into our gaggle of serious athletes.

As you would have expected, Alicia killed it. #ThePresident made it in record time. And I, well, never would have made it without that baggie of ice.

What were the lessons learned on this day?

1. Committing to a training plan actually works. Because, science. #EBoogieDidThat #ItsKindOfAThingToTrainAccordingToAPlan

2.  Stopping only feels like failure if you make it feel that way. Most people don’t care. It seems to be a big deal to me tho.

3.    Supportive friends are everything. Even if they make race signs that literally cause you to laugh hysterically and almost forget that you’re running a race.

4.    Inspiration is cyclic. Much like energy it isn’t created or destroyed. Just transferred.

Inspiration.

If our lives are like #TheMatrix and we run into a program at the train station, then we know... Inspiration (like love) is just a word. What matters is the connection it implies - the meaning we give it.

Before the race, when #ThePresident asked Eboogie to take a picture of us, me being his running inspiration ... Not gonna lie, I felt a thug tear. But I held it together.

I have no idea what connection he implied or meaning he gives that word, but I'm honored and humbled. I'm not a great runner, but I suppose I've got something to give people who desire to run.

Oh, and he SMOKED the streets of Sacramento!

Somehow something I’ve said, or done or been, has inspired him. I knew all too well before his wave took off that he was going to run the race of his life. I had no doubt. I could see it in him and around him. And all the while, his courage in that moment, despite all the anxiety and unknown, was inspiring me.

#15ThingsIn2015 Challenge

5 new states

4 new friends (OldieButNewbie #RunningHubby – 1 down, 3 to go)

3 new running events (Shamrock Half – 1 down, 2 to go)

2 back-to-back running events

1 Half Marathon PR

71% Complete and 7 Medals To Go. Wait. What?

When Alicia maKeykey, Dr. Splits on Trees and I set out to do this here running thing, I had no idea what it would look like, or what I would be like coming to the end of the year. I mean, honestly, I only thought this was possible in theory. Not so much that a person could achieve such a feat, but that I could be that person to achieve it. And though race after race happened, and I changed the color of the text from black to green on the calendar, I was not convinced. I was not persuaded. But, time just kept on passing me by all that same. And races. And medals. And paychecks. But I’m in the 4^th Quarter, and I am finding my inner Jordan. It's 1992.

Well, the end of the year sucks because quite frankly I’m not sure I like myself, and I want my goals to be as difficult as humanly possible to obtain. With that being said, I am officially signed up for six (6) more races. Four (4) of them are next month.

…on back-to-back days. Because I haven’t done this before at all (see THIS and that THAT, to have that last line made null and void), and I totally believe that running back-to-back events is good for you. Yeah. That.

See? I need counseling.

So I didn’t mean to do it. I Promise. I Swear. It’s just that when I see medals I have delusions of grandeur, and I’m like the greatest person you know, so I HAVE TO DO IT NO MATTER THE HUMAN, MATERIAL, OR FINANCIAL COST. I have to run. I need medals. I need them to survive.

Wait, I don’t need counseling. This is totally normal behavior. For a runner.

Okay, so hell is the month of October. And it’s marked by the following running events (not even counting Halloween):

1.    Rock n Roll San Jose 5K (Saturday) – 1^st race in the SJ Remix Challenge

2.    Rock n Roll San Jose Half Marathon (the next Sunday) – the 2^nd race in the #IRunTheCoastChallenge & the 2^nd race completing the SJ Remix Challenge *additional challenge medal earned

3.      Let’s Go 510K (a Saturday later in the month) – the 3^rd race completing the #IRunTheBayChallenge *additional challenge medal earned

4.    Rock n Roll Los Angeles Half Marathon (Sunday, in Los Angeles, as in I have to get on an airplane after I run a 10K and get my challenge medal to prepare to run 13.1 miles with my BabyMama the next day) – the 3^rd race in the #IRunTheCoastChallenge *additional challenge medal earned #HeavyMedalist

There’s that. …and then there’s November.

1.    Rock n Roll Las Vegas 5K (Saturday night) – 1^st race in the LV Remix Challenge

2.    Rock n Roll Las Vegas Half Marathon (that next Sunday night) – the 2^nd race completing the LV Remix Challenge *additional challenge medal earned

I mean, there’s Thanksgiving, I might love medals, but I NEED my dressing #NotStuffing #ItsDifferent #TrustMeImARunner&HolidayEater, and ham and other delicious life sustaining foods. I ain’t got time to be running when there are collard greens that need’a cookin!

So, December comes along and…

…I don’t have a single race scheduled. Mostly because I cannot decide what race I want to end this epic #14in2014 experience with. It’s got to mean something so this year means something to me when my ovaries finally do something useful besides remind me they are here once a month (I HEARD AND FELT YOU CLEARLY! Grrrrr!) and scramble one of my eggs with my somebody son’s genetic material. That thing we create in my uterus will need to know how this ended. And that story will need to be great.

…and you still have time to be part of my greatness. You can still run with me. You can start. You can finish. Just like I did in January. And, every month after that. Except July, August & September. #ItWasHotInTheBay #ThenIGotLazy #AndAllUpInMyFeelings #ohAndAYearCuter(Older) #andThenTheSemesterStarted

Just like what I’ll be come December.

This is perfectly normal behavior.

*still in my feelings* The 4th Quarter is going to be amazing. It always is. And, it's always the beginning of the end. I think I planned for evey contingency except for this ending. *le sigh*

MEDALS MOTIVATE ME: Race 4, Medal 3

"The Legend of Extraordinary Luck"

…so here goes it. Question? What do Mariachi Bands, Banana Republic, Pizza and Green/Camouflage Sperry’s have in common?

Easy! The San Jose 408K Running Experience! Race to the Row 2014! Yes folks, the 408K is in the books! I literally woke up Sunday winning. And it wasn’t just because my very first love, my Daddie was born March 2^nd! Happy Birthday Pops! I did though, you know, wake up winning, even in the drizzle of San Jose. When I called him after the race, he said:

Daddie: You ran 5 miles? Hmph. I don’t think an ambulance could help me get that far! #He’sHilarious

I convinced my Bay Breeze FB friend turned running buddy to drive down for the race even though she planned to run it virtually. Talked one of my employee-running-friends to do the race as a precursor to the Tough Mudder, KD a.k.a. Dr. Splits On Trees came to pound the pavement with me after our January trail adventure and my Angelica Rollerskates even showed up for some post-race fun!

Told you. #WINNING

       

Friday Race “Expo”: ugh. Orange race bib. I should have said I was going to run faster than my actual pace so I could have gotten a different color. That teal over there is everything! I would have even been able to better accessorize that grey. What in the world am I going to do with this?

*smile for the camera! #anotherraceexpocherrypopped*

Saturday, Pre-Race: The devil is a lie. Chance of rain? Welp, that means no chance I am running without braids.

*spends Saturday watching He-Man & the Masters of the Universe, braiding hair*

Sunday, Pre-Race: *this is my excited for #medal3 face* -_-

Start: This is going to be fun. I think. #doingthisforRFII

Mile 1: No rain yet. Sweet. Even though I spent all day yesterday doing my damn hair. Anticipating rain, that isn’t coming. #bestweekendever

Mile 2: I kinda like this route. San Jose got some nice stuff. What neighborhood is this again? #MeLikey

Mile 3: I want a taco. Ooooh! The cherry blossoms. I want to live on this street. And eat tacos.

Mile 4: I know damn well it's not about to rain right now! Dammit. #justsprinkles #notthecupcakes #TillmanMemorialMile

Mile 5 (0.97): Um, how about you finish the race. It’s not necessary to take a picture with EVERY Mariachi Band you see on the Mariachi Mile.

*pause*music*selfie/groupie*run*repeat*

Finish: This one was for you Roc! Okay, now where are the mimosas and tacos?

Post Race: Included hitting KD (aka Dr. Splits on Trees) in the face *kinda* trying to take a picture jumping at the photo station and the best pizza and mini cupcakes a girl could pay for! Yasssssss!!! There was even a chartered bus ride back to my free parking spot on the street near the SAP Center. Did I mention I probably had the best post-race pizza ever?

Angelica: She’s never been here; she might need a minute to check out the menu.

Me: I know what I want. I want pizza. I want the pizza with the most meat on it.

Waiter: Then you might want to try this one.

Me: Okay. But that doesn’t look like enough. I’ll have it, but um, add that fennel sausage to it too.  #noroastedonions

Everything about this race was awesome. Great neighborhood route. No backtracking. Happy runners and walkers. A Mariachi Mile of music and smiles. And of course, Medal #3. I could not of asked for anything more. And I didn’t. But I got it. At the Race “Expo” I stopped by the Athelta table. The nice young lady there gave me a bag, a purple and grey hair tie, “Power of the She” tattoos and a card to redeem a surprise gift card ($5 to $50) on race day at their store in Valley Fair.

I crossed over Santana Row to the Mall to get my goodies at the Athelta store, right? It just so happened to be a $20 gift card to Banana Republic…which turned into the cutest top I am going to wear to some special event soon! Because a $20 gift card, plus 40% off = WINNING! #mymathisgettingbetter

I accidentally stopped by DSW because it was in the way of me getting home, right? Just so happens, there were some Sperry’s I accidentally left there. Which happened to be 70% off. So, I was basically just picking up shoes that were already mine, because, camo everything, is everything to me.

AND…hello? My 3^rd Medal! I am sooooo winning!

Yep Mrs. Bradshaw, medals totally motivate me too.

Today’s Race: 8K, 408K: Race To The Row, San Jose CA

Medaled Miles to date: 17.37 miles

#theycouldhaveroundeditupto5milestho

Total Raced Miles to date: 20.47miles

11 Medals To Go ǁ 21% Complete